Mark Garrity has a few words of encouragement for the Yellow Elephants. He writes:
Jesus General JC Christian at http://patriotboy.blogspot.com/ is organizing a US Army enlistment drive among college Republicans. I've done my part by writing the College Republican Nat'l. Committee at http://www.crnc.org/default1.asp Pass it on.
6/16/05
Dear CRNC,
You guys do good work. I particularly like your stuff on Social Security. I'm sure with help from people like you, the President will be able to privatize the whole system before he leaves office. 'm writing today to ask a favor.
As you probably know our occupation of Iraq isn't going as well as it could. Some of the less gungho members of the military like this General Casey are calling our military efforts in Iraq "thePillsbury Doughboy idea" -- pressing the insurgency in one area only causes it to rise elsewhere. Well there's a reason for this apparently defeatist attitude: we don't have enough soldiers in our volunteer military to stay the course. We need to kill or capture and yes, if need be "rough up" insurgents for the vital intelligence we need to win the hearts and minds of Iraqis and prove we'll be there for the long haul to protect them.
But the Army has missed its recruiting goals for 4 months running. The Marines, thank God, have only missed their goals one month out of the last 10 years. The Navy and Air Force are doing fine recruiting-wise but very few of them are sent to Iraq. Don't even ask about the Reserves and the Guard. That's a sucker's bet anyway. Join the Guard and you'll get sent to Iraq for less pay and benes with older equipment than the regular Army. Who needs that?
Anyway, my point is the volunteer Army needs soldiers if we are to complete the mission in Iraq. And where better to find them but among college Republicans? You're the best and brightest and our country needs you now. Won't you please ask your members to get down to their local recruiting office and sign up today? A big blurb on your website with a link to http://www.goarmy.com/ would help alot!
The alternative I'm afraid is a draft. A lot of DC military types are openly talking about it. Even that creep Biden broached the subject on one of those Sunday morning talk shows this weekend. If there's a draft it's bound to scoop up a bunch of lefties that have no interest in President Bush's success or a successful outcome in Iraq. They and their hippy parents may well start massive demonstrations that could force us to bring our troops home before the mission is accomplished, just like Vietnam. But even if they don't, do we want those kind of people taking credit for President Bush's victory? We don't need to be making anymore John Kerrys if you know what I mean. If we hadn't had the Swiftboat veterans exposing his record last year, he might very well be President today! Think about that.
And then think about what a stint in Iraq with the US army will do for YOUR record and your cred. Imagine not only the big cash enlistment bonus and educational opportunities you'll receive but the way phrases like, "take it from me, I was there" or "when I fought in Iraq" will sagely roll off your tongue and stop all arguments right in their tracks as admirers (especially the ladies) turn to hear your words of wisdom in years to come.
This is your chance to make the money and earn the respect you and your family so richly deserve by becoming a US Army combat veteran. Now I'm sure your parents are going to be concerned about your safety. Remind them that Vice PresidentCheney says the insurgency is in it's last throes. By the time you get out of basic training - and I'm not going to sugarcoat it - and get sent to Iraq, the fighting should be all but over. But in the event the Vice President's prediction proves to be premature, you and your parents can rest easy knowing you'll be fighting with the finest military the world has ever seen against an assortment of poorly trained jihadis and cranky Sunni Arabs who don't even know how to properly clean a weapon let alone fire one. Yes it'll be hot, uncomfortable and you'll stand a small but real chance of getting killed or maimed, most likely by an IED, but if you look at it, your chances of dying are really not that much greater than getting run over on campus by a drugged-out war protester who can't see out the front window of his car because of all the pot smoke.
And btw do you really want to spend the next several years futilely debating with potsmoking clowns and socialist professors, or wouldn't you really rather do something that would really help the President, the Republican party and yourselves? We need you to grab for the glory today! Won't you please help?
* * *
6/17/05
I'm disappointed in you. I know it's not Festivus time but my airing of grievances can't wait til the holidays. After writing you yesterday, I thought surely by now there'd be a link on your main page to at least one US Army recruiter. But even when I click there, on the link for jobs and internships on your front page I see nothing, nada, doodly squat about anything related at all to the military! This simply will not do.
Let me explain something kids. We're at war. The US Army fell short of its enlistment goals in May by 25 percent.They had hoped to recruit 6,700 new members but missed the mark by 1,661 recruits. Even after lowering their quota from over 8000 they still missed their goals. This makes the fourth month in a row that the active duty Army hasn't been able to round up enough able bodied, drug free, nonfelon patriots like yourselves to fill the ranks. Wars don't win themselves ya know. We need you and those like you in basic training getting ready to go to Iraq yesterday!
Now there you did it. Do you see that? Well of course you don't, but take my word for it, you just made me cry. Now maybe some of you have other priorities. I can certainly understand that. It would have been a tragedy of monumental proportions for instance if Vice PresidentCheney or President Bush had perished in a steaming jungle in Vietnam, impaled through the heart with blood spurting out as they writhed in agony on a pungee stick full of icky Viet Cong poison in a trap set by dirty guerillas who didn't fight fairly. But look, some of you are never going to grow up to hold high office. You know who you are and for you the risks are tolerable. Even if you do see yourself as POTUS, SCOTUS or SECDEF material you must have friends--ok maybe not friends, but acquaintances--who don't. What's the harm in talking up an Army career to them?
You claim to have more than 120,000 members in your organization. If just a tiny percentage of your group signed up today, Army Recruiting Command wouldn't have to have nationwide stand-down days like they did in May to remind their people that kidnapping, threats, and lying to potential recruits is verboten. It's so tough these days for recruiters to find the right kind of men they've had to resort to shanghaiing them! That's just not right. If you all signed up, all120,000 of you, imagine how fast we could clean up the world. We'd have enough boots to put on the ground to take Syria, Iran and North Korea or any other place PresidentBush chose to liberate. And probably in a whole lot less than 3 weeks!
You are the hope of the world, the cream of the crop, so I hope you'll help me dry my tears and at the very least correct this oversight by putting up a link to GoArmy.com on your front page. They'll probably even pay you a few sheckels if you do. Whaddya say?
Yours Truly,
Mark Garrity
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